999 Reasons to Laugh About Infertility

#799 Telling you how much daycare costs does not make you feel better about infertility

No! Telling you how much her kids daycare costs does not make you feel better about not being able to get pregnant. Telling you that she has not slept in 2 years does not make you feel better. Asking if you “still want one” after seeing her child have a temper tantrum does not make you feel better. Yes, unhelpful mommy friend, I still want to have a baby. “We spent $30,000 a year on baby Timmy’s daycare; $40,000 on little Carol’s private school for the gifted… Are you sure you still want a baby? They are sooooo expensive.” Wow. Putting it that way, maybe you’re right! I’ll just tell my husband that after years of trying and multiple fertility treatments that we no longer want a baby because daycare costs are too high. I really wish you would have told us before we spent $40,000 on failed fertility treatments. And thank you for asking if “we still want to have a baby” after seeing your child have a full temper tantrum in the grocery store. Thank you. We thought all children were well-behaved and perfect. We also do realize that children “get sick a lot too,” and they are “very tiring.” But thanks for letting us know. Hold on a sec while I inform my husband that we no longer want a baby. We were under the impression that parenthood was easy and that all mothers got at least 10 hours of sleep, waking up refreshed and happy. Thanks again for letting us know that children get sick, are sticky and snotty, cry, pick their noses, and wear smelly diapers. We had just assumed that babies come out of the womb, with a grin on their face and reading the New York Times. We’re sure if you also realized these things prior to motherhood, you would have not wanted your baby either. Right, mommy? Thank you fertile mommy but we know that babies are a lot of work, costly, cry, eat, pooh, barf, whine, and you know what? We absolutely cannot wait!

taken from 999 Reasons to Laugh About Infertility